Coaching Corner: Oops!
By Marilou Butcher Roth, Master Coach
“A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new” - Albert Einstein
We certainly recognize the person who penned this quote, and we also realize the degree of intelligence that he held. So, there must be some validity to his statement. Let’s look a bit closer at this quote -- think about a time when you made what you deemed to be a mistake. Don’t get carried away here, we just need one!
Bringing that one mistake to mind, how did you experience it? Did you every so efficiently beat yourself up, even going beyond that particular mistake, and bringing up a litany of your mistakes from the past? Oh yes, this is something I personally can do quite well, and I am thinking perhaps that is true for you all as well.
When we make what we are calling a mistake, I am encouraging you to view this err differently. Let’s explore how you can take 100 percent healthy responsibility for what has occurred. When you can do this, the blame steps out of the equation. Think about it, when we are in a place of blame for ourselves, or others, it is difficult to move to a better space, and often our best solutions elude us.
Acknowledging the faux pas without the blame or self degradation is empowering and allows you to remain in integrity with yourself. Let’s use something simple as an example -- being late for a meeting or appointment. You pride yourself on being punctual and yet, there you are, walking into a meeting a good 10 minutes late. Leaving earlier was the plan, and yet you spent more time than necessary on something else. You left late, rushed to get there and walked in shamefully, armed with what you deemed to be valid excuses. You are fully entrenched in the blame game.
Okay, you were late. You made a choice to engage in delaying activities. Rather than spew your well thought out excuses, just acknowledge that you were late. It doesn’t feel good to walk into a meeting after it has begun. Without blaming yourself, you can make a clear choice as to how you want to proceed. I promise you, coming from choice rather than blame, you will not find yourself in that position again. However, if you spend time in self flagellation, it grows, tapping into other not so healthy thoughts you have about yourself. From this place, there is a good chance, similar situations will occur.
Back to Albert’s quote...think about how your fears of past mistakes keeps you from trying something new. This is the perfect time of year to begin crafting plans for the new year.
What would you like to try, without the tin cans of past mistakes trailing behind you? Now that’s exciting!
Marilou Butcher Roth is the owner of The MBR Group, a coaching and training company working primarily with REALTORS who have a desire to work and live from a more inspired place. She is also the Broker/Owner of Group REALTORS in Cincinnati. Marilou is a member of the Ohio REALTORS Board of Directors and past chairman of the organization’s Communications Committee. Feel free to contact Marilou to see if coaching is right for you.
