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Coaching Corner: Are you really mad?
By Marilou Butcher Roth, Master Coach
Currently, my day has turned itself somewhat upside down and what I had planned on doing will clearly not be happening! Undoubtedly, this similar type of situation has occurred for you at some point in your life. So...tell me, did you get angry? Or perhaps just a but frustrated?
Here is the skinny on anger and milder versions of that emotion, such as frustration. When you experience any level of this heated emotion, it is a great opportunity for gaining another level of self awareness. Yep, it is yet another opportunity for something most of us are oblivious to -- being aware of what is happening with us.
The majority of the time, and I mean a large majority -- there is another emotion creeping about, hiding itself under the more obvious emotion of anger. It may be fear, or it may be sadness -- or both. Your job as your own internal private detective, is to uncover what that might be.
So, I will take you back to my own day of feeling frustrated with the upheaval of my schedule. Now keep in mind, its not just one thing that has gone off the rails, it began early and seems to be continuing. What is happening under this uncomfortable emotion of frustration for me? And...what do I want at this point?
As I tune inward, I notice I have a sense of chaos internally -- a bit of stomach churning if you will. Hmm, chaos and stomach churning point highly in the direction of fear. Now this doesn’t need to be teeth chattering fear -- again, there are always varying degrees of our emotions. Why might this be coming up? I had things laid out beautifully for the day and now things are totally off kilter. What do I want at this point? What I want is to put my attention on the items that absolutely need to be accomplished today so that I feel complete. As I tune into this, I notice my breath is happening is a more easeful way and my initial feelings have shifted into a clearer space.
Hopefully, my crazy day will be of service to you in some way, and I am off to complete my tasks and have some fun!!!