Coaching Corner: Look again!
By "Coach" Marilou Butcher Roth
Earlier this week I was having a conversation with one of my coaching clients, and the phrase “self transparency” came out of my mouth. It cracks me up when this happens -- it was not a phrase that I have ever used before. After I spoke it, I actually wrote it down so I wouldn’t forget what I said.
We speak a lot in our society about being transparent -- transparent with what’s happening in our world, our governing bodies, our companies, etc. How much though, are we being transparent with ourselves? How much do we find ourselves engaged in blame or judgement without even the slightest hint of going within, to ask what we are truly feeling, or how we may have brought a situation into our experience?
It starts with us people! If we are consistently looking outside of ourselves, we are missing out not only on major learnings, but the real juice of life! Getting to this place will take some practice, so don’t expect to master this idea of self transparency overnight.
Begin with this simple exercise -- right where you are, notice something around you. Don’t go deep on this, keep it simple. Perhaps you are currently sitting at your desk. What do you see? It is easy for me to use this example because that is exactly where I am sitting! As I look up from typing, I am drawn to a ceramic glass of sorts that I put my reading glasses in -- it is a gray blue color on the outside and white on the inside. OK so far? Now its your turn. What do you notice?
Now, loop back to yourself. Bring your awareness inward and see what you notice. I suddenly have the thought that I am not sitting up as straight as I like to. Your turn again -- what do you notice internally?
You may be thinking how silly this exercise is. That’s OK. It is really to prime you for larger awareness. Learning the art of looping your attention back and forth between what is happening within you and then outside of you, heightens the degree of information that you can access.
Having this skill set allows you to easily tune in to YOU and what’s really happening -- hence, being self transparent. Tuning in brings you to deeper questions of “what do I really want” and “how is this particular pattern serving me?"
You may even put a note in appropriate locations to remind you to notice. Please remember to keep it simple and have fun!
