Coaching Corner: The power of NO!
By "Coach" Marilou Butcher Roth
Several times during the past few days, I have had conversations with people (some clients, some not), who have voiced their dismay at something they have agreed to do that they do not want to do. Oh, I'm sure its easy from where you sit right now to say well they shouldn't have agreed to do it. Not. that. simple!
Each and every one of us, at some point, agrees to do something that we are not really jazzed about doing -- its just the way it is. Reasons vary from I feel like I should, or I didn't feel like I had a choice in the matter, to I don't want to upset him/her. Notice if any or all of these feel familiar.
Somehow saying no has gotten a really bad rap, and for some, it is not even in their vocabulary! Saying no does not have to be an angry or dismissive response. Not only is learning when to say no healthy, it also adds greatly to your emotional intelligence.
Let's look at a small disclaimer here -- if you voice your no, do not do it under the guise of I can't. That is not, for the most part, an authentic statement. You probably can do it -- it comes down to want. You might say that won't work for me at this time, or perhaps you create an alternative that does work for you. And notice when you do say no, if you feel compelled to apologize. If you are coming from a clear place, no apologizes will even come up!
This week, I want you to really tune into your no's by paying attention to when you have a situation present itself. The more you can be authentic in your interactions, the better you will feel and quite frankly, the better your clients, friends and family will feel!
Give it a try, you might be surprised!
