Coaching Corner: And the award goes to...
By "Coach" Marilou Butcher Roth
Drama -- we pay money to view it on the big screen and we enjoy watching as stories unfold. What about the drama that we see, and possibly participate in within our own lives? It is not uncommon for me to hear from someone that they are not interested in drama, and interestingly, there is a good chance they are right in the midst of the dramatic experience themselves. So, how do these less than desirable situations occur?
My belief is that drama becomes an addiction of sorts, there is an underlying essence of adrenaline lurking about, which some people can become so used to in their lives that they crave it. They get into patterns of behavior that feed into the drama they claim to abhor.
Drama can be anywhere, office, home, with friends. A good part of the time it begins in a way that seems innocent enough. Someone comes to you with “can I talk to you (in confidence) about something that’s happening?” We respond affirmatively, of course, because we are nice and want to help, right? Even though our intentions are filled with goodness, there is an opportunity to get caught up in the drama of the situation.
These situations will happen -- it's human nature! Knowing that, let’s look at some ways to honor the other person and also keeping you from spiraling into the mix. Begin with assessing yourself, committing to authenticity and integrity. When a situation presents itself, DO NOT jump in with advice -- listen to the other person and notice what you notice, both with them and within yourself. You are fine to respond with “it sounds like you are upset,” or, “how would you like to handle this?” These, of course, are very generic responses and hopefully give you some idea of how to handle these types of conversations.
The key is to NOT contribute to the situation. Perhaps you have knowledge of some other information regarding the story at hand. OK, that does not mean it gets shared. Gossip is destructive and none of us want to be at the other end of someone else’s gossip. So, let’s not do it to others.
Think about the Golden Rule -- not doing (or saying) anything to others that you would not want done (or said) about you. Find healthier modes of communication and I promise you will enjoy your relationships much more. The award for drama is not one that you want to receive!! Keep those awards to our on screen friends!
Marilou Butcher Roth
Marilou Butcher Roth is the owner of The MBR Group, a coaching and training company working primarily with REALTORS who have a desire to work and live from a more inspired place. She is also the Broker/Owner of Group REALTORS in Cincinnati.
Marilou is a member of the Ohio REALTORS Board of Directors and past chairman of the organization’s Communications Committee.
